Jack Shephard
new oceanic 815.
Don't. Pity. Me. You have no idea what I've been through.
Posts: 197
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Post by Jack Shephard on Jun 1, 2008 14:51:32 GMT -5
The sound of a wacking ice tray made Jack stur slightly, shifting on the bed. His head felt heavy, his body moreso, and he tried to block out the sounds of the ice-cubes hitting the glass. "It's too early..." he mumbled, his body still under the effects of the pills. Henry...Henry had readily prescribed him something to take the edge off of such a traumatic event, and Jack had prescribed his own self-medicating; the dozens of bottles of Jack Daniels had he had eagerly downed. He had managed to pass out somewhere near three, and yet, Jack still felt exausted.
He moved a hand sluggishly to the nightstand, hearing the closed bottle of pills clatter to the floor, along with an empty glass and a few empty plastic bottles of vodka and whiskey. The sound of his father's slight laughter rang in Jack's ears, and Jack felt himself groan. He couldn't be here, Jack thought through the last sober part of h is brain.
He was dead...
"I gotta hand it to ya, Jackson, Kiddo, you've really got a knack for screwin' peoples lives all up."
Jack's eyes snapped open, and he jerked to his back, looking towards where the sound of his father came from. No...no he was dead. The room was dark, and it was only an outline, but even in the outline...he could see him smiling.
"You made a mistake, Jack. When you called that phone, you made the biggest mistake of your life. You need to think with your mind, kiddo, not your heart. You know what you have to do, and you know it's waiting for you."
Jack was unable to speak, only able to stare wideeyed and slackjawed at the sight of his father. Christian lifted the glass to his lips, smirking as he watched his son.
"It's not over, Jack. You can tuck it up into a nice little package of past events, but it's not gonna go away, son. The Island needs you." Christian smirked slightly and lifted the glass. "Cheers, kiddo."
Jack jolted up in bed, panting as he looked violently around the room for any sign of his father. His pants were harsh as he brought a shaking hand to his face, tears of frustration and a little bit of fear squeezing their way out of his eyes. He threw back the covers and stood up, padding barefoot to the glass that sat by the chair. Swiping it to the floor, he watched as the glass bounced with a thud thud thuding to the carpeted floor. The ice and scotch looked like a mini crime scene, and he tried to push away the feeling. He was dead. He was dead and it was just a hallucination. A side effect of the drugs. He reached over, feeling for the bottle of pills that were now down on the floor. He frowned and reached down, grabbing the bottle as he popped the cap off. He shook one into his hand and popped it into his mouth, reaching for a half-empty bottle of vodka, downing the pill in one gulp.
He thought of going to check on Sun and the baby, but as he felt his eyes close, he knew that he wouldn't be able to get out of bed for at least five minutes. He reached over, grabbing the phone and dialing Santa Rosa. "Hi, this is Doctor Shephard calling for Doctor Matthis? Yes. Yes, I'll hold." Jack moved, bringing a shaky hand up to rub at his temples before he opened his eyes. "Hey, Henry. How is she? Yeah. Temporarily. Yeah. No, no, her um...her boyfriend drowned on the island shortly before we were found. Yeah. She's been...distant ever since. Oh, that, um...yeah, I didn't even know about it until Mom found out in the papers. Yeah, I don't know why he didn't tell me. Look, I gotta go, just give me a call and let me know. I'm gonna stop by later tonight and check up, you'll be around? Alright. Great. Thanks again, Henry. You too. Bye."
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Post by eko on Jun 17, 2008 4:46:19 GMT -5
He walked down the hallway with his robe pressed, his collar tight. No one thought to bother a priest walking around in this hotel and this outfit had saved him from suspicion on too many occasions to note.
Months of dreams had haunted him. Dreams about running from people with dirty, bare feet and ragged clothes. Dreams of numbers and a button. Dreams of black, clouding smoke and a dark, haired woman with a trail of blood running from her lips that kept coming in the nick of time to save him. Ana Lucia. That is what he called her in the dream.
He knew what these dreams meant and he knew what he had to do about it. He had seen the media circus. He had found out about the Oceanic crew and the two men that seemed to speak for the entire group - A Mr Locke and a Mr Shephard.
Eko Tunde took the first flight he could get to L.A. in hopes of confronting these men about these experiences and righting a wrong from his past... righting a wrong from all of their pasts.
He'd found the details for the whereabouts of Mr Shephard quite easily. He was a spinal surgeon and well known. He could always be found through the hospital where he got the details of his current whereabouts at this hotel in the room he was now fast approaching.
Eko decided that the Good Lord was telling him to go to Jack first, giving the coincidence of his last name relating to Mr Eko's favorite Psalm. Eko reached the end of the hallway. No one had seemed to notice the priest make his way into the hotel, or if they did they assumed it was official Catholic business and left him alone.
He stood in front of the room door and stuck out a very large, black hand. He knocked three times, slowly on the door as if deliberating every knock.
Questions needed to be asked. Peace needed to be found.
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Jack Shephard
new oceanic 815.
Don't. Pity. Me. You have no idea what I've been through.
Posts: 197
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Post by Jack Shephard on Jun 18, 2008 0:43:57 GMT -5
The sounds around him sounded like they were through water, as if Jack was sitting on the bottom of the ocean. The bed felt like a giant cushy cacoon, until the sounds got louder and clearer, until he realised that it was the door and it was being knocked out. Slowly, Jack's head turned on the bed to look towards the door. He realised then that there was still knocking.
He moved, rolling off of the bed and to his feet slowly, feeling his legs liquify underneath him. He steadied himself on the bed and moved slowly moved to the door. His mind was cloudy and he was sure that he looked like complete and utter stoned hell, but even that was fogged over, clouded in the anti-anxiety pills that he had taken mixed with the alcohol. "Sun, just come back later, okay, I'm--"
As he spoke, he opened the door slowly, and stood, shocked at who he saw in front of him.
No. No, Eko was dead. Eko was dead, the Monster had killed him and...oh god, Jack thought silently. He was going insane. Claire wans't the one that was crazy, it was him. First he saw his father, and now Eko?
No. No, Eko was dead. "You're--" he started out, his own voice sounding alien to him. It was slow and slurred and Jack stumbled back, catching himself on the table by the bed. He turned as quickly as the drugs would let him, and he stumbled to the bed, grabbing the bottle. No. This was a side effect of the drugs. It was a hallucination and hallucinations went away as long as you stayed calm.
One...two...three...four...]
Jack kept his eyes closed, moving to pop off the cap and take another pill, washing it down with the watered down scotch that was sitting by the bed. "You're dead." Jack said as he saw Eko enter the room. "You're dead and...and this isn't logical."
He tried to pour another another drink, but the bottle shook and clattered against the glass before he just simply decided to drink straight from the bottle. "If I ignore it, it'll go away. I don't see it. I don't--" he muttered to himself, taking another long drink.
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Post by eko on Jun 18, 2008 2:31:28 GMT -5
Mr Eko stood back with the hint of a smile on his face. "Mr Shephard? My name is Eko, Mr Eko." His voice came across softly.
The man's reaction to his arrival was a very telling sign. He stood in the doorway until Mr Shephard edged back like he had just seen a ghost. Then Eko decided to step forth to do something to help the man. Assure him that what he had just seen was indeed real.
He could only assume that these Oceanic 815 Survivors had been seeing a lot of ghosts since they arrived back, if his dreams had anything to do with what they went through. The way the man downed some perscription pills with hotel room liquor was another good sign of that.
Eko stood by the doorway, so as not to invade the man's personal space and closed the door behind him. "I assure you I am real." He told him, with that same knowing smile still plastered there. "I take it you have... seen me before?"
Eko had a hunch about this and now this hunch was confirmed, he just didn't know how it could be. But Eko had been confronted with a lot of miracles as of late and he didn't question it. He just stood back and waited to be invited to sit down.
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Jack Shephard
new oceanic 815.
Don't. Pity. Me. You have no idea what I've been through.
Posts: 197
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Post by Jack Shephard on Jun 18, 2008 8:17:00 GMT -5
Jack found himself laughing, though nothing was funny. The laugh was pained, almost tearfilled as he moved, gulping down the firey liquid with a frown. "Do I know you? Yeah, I know you." Jack said tiredly, pointing a finger with the hand that held the glass. "I know you're supposed to be dead. You're--"
How the hell was Eko standing in front of him? HE poured another drink sloppily, almost spilling the entire bottle as he looked over, seeing Eko still standing. HE scoffed slightly, shaking his head. "You're--you're a figmant of my imagination. A hallucination from the drugs." he told Eko, wishing that he would just go. "Just--Just go, okay? I can't--I won't deal with this. Not now, I'm not going to deal with this now."
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Post by eko on Jun 18, 2008 17:25:25 GMT -5
Eko felt the sorrow in the man's words as he told him to go and attempted to pour a drink, the liquid running over his hands and onto the floor. He knew that everyone reacted differently to seeing things and obviously this man did not take it well.
He waited for an invitation no longer, came and sat in a chair in the corner, watching the man on the bed who seemed to be already affected by the pills and drinks he'd been taking. "You must deal with this now" Eko said firmly, believing himself to be correct. His answers about Yemi would have to be put on hold for the moment.
"Mr Shephard. You were on an island, correct?" Eko didn't wait for confirmation for this, he knew what he knew about their experiences because in a way, he experienced them too. "And I believe something significant happened to you while you were on that island."
Eko relaxed back in his seat, but the hint of a smile was leaving him, Eko was worried about this man. "Tell me, have you ever read John 3:5?" Something told him that he hadn't but he thought he'd open it up anyhow.
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Jack Shephard
new oceanic 815.
Don't. Pity. Me. You have no idea what I've been through.
Posts: 197
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Post by Jack Shephard on Jun 18, 2008 22:13:43 GMT -5
"No. No, I don't have to deal with ANYTHING right now if I don't WANT to." Jack said sternly, his voice harsh. Eko asked about an Island, and Jack scoffed, loudly, bringing a hand up to rub at his face harshly. "Of course I was on an Island, Eko. You know that. I'm back here in Los Angeles and I still can't seem to get away from that goddamned Island." Jack said harshly. God, he was so tired. So goddamned tired and he didn't need this right now. Eko spoke, asking if Jack had ever read the bible. His mother had read to him when he had been a child, but he had never read it constantly or remembered verses by heart. A sigh escaped his lips, harsh and tired, and he shook his head, looking at Eko. Why was he even talking with him? Some illusion that his mind brought on?
"No. No, I havn't Eko. You know I havn't." Jack said, his voice holding a sarcasticly annoyed edge. "Why? Come to teach me a lesson about the evils of drinking? I think I've deserved it, don't you? After everything I've done for all of you? I am sick and tired of everyone trying to tell me what they think I should do."
Christian's words coming out of his mouth. They almost tasted bitter, angry and sour but Jack couldn't stop them.
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Post by eko on Jun 18, 2008 23:47:34 GMT -5
Eko ignored his angry outbursts, if he said anything about them he knew it would just antagonize the man. He spoke the verse he'd asked about very softly, "Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be born of water and of the Spirit, he cannot enter into the kingdom of God."
"Do you know what this verse means?" He leant forward, placing his elbows on his knees, his robe draping. He knew that all he would get as an answer to that question was more anger, so he continued unabatedly. "It speaks of being reborn. Of being born again. I am to believe that you had a similar experience when you came to this... island." He spoke the word 'island' softly, mysteriously... as if they were sharing a secret that wasn't what it was at all.
"And I believe," he paused and looked the man right in the eye, conveying the weight of what he was about to say, "that is why you have to go back."
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Jack Shephard
new oceanic 815.
Don't. Pity. Me. You have no idea what I've been through.
Posts: 197
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Post by Jack Shephard on Jun 19, 2008 0:23:29 GMT -5
Jack shook his head, first slowly, and then quicker as he heard what Eko was saying. "No. No..."
"STOP!"
Jack's near scream peirced through the last of Eko's words, and it was only then did he realise that the glass that he had held in his hand had been shattered against the nightstand. The pain only dully registered as a slight tingle instead of a sharp burning that it should have been. "You're wrong." he said sharply, standing up as quick as he could muster to move to the bathroom. He nearly tripped over his own feet in the process before he shoved on the light with his free hand before he shoved his hand under the sink. "We're not. Going. Back." Jack said each word sharply, pointedly and harsh as he watched the blood move from the small cuts on his hand. "You're dead. You're dead and I can't be having a conversation with a DEAD PERSON!" he almost whispered the last words in a seethe.
"We're not going back. I've--we've--" Jack stumbled over his words, and he clenched his eyes shut as he wrapped the handtowel around his cut hand before he slammed it down on the sink counter to try to focus on his words. "We're not. Going. Back. You--you can tell my father to go to hell, that--that we're not going back." Jack said, trying to focus on something that he was sure was there, like the pain that was slowly starting to come through his medicine-clogged brain.
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Post by eko on Jun 19, 2008 1:10:01 GMT -5
Obviously what Eko had said had not calmed down the man as he had hoped. Mr Shephard had let out an ear piercing shout of 'Stop!' but Eko acted like his outburst was not affecting him, or his message that he had to get through to him.
He simply placed his hands in his lap this time and gave the man another calm, understanding look. "Mr Shephard. It would seem that you have been born of the Spirit of this Island and that is why you must go back."
When the man's outbursts were regarding to him dying, Mr Eko wasn't sure what to believe. Did they meet on the island or on the plane? He was sure it was the former, but now he couldn't be one hundred percent on that assessment. "I have not mentioned your father" Eko further pressed, "but I would like you to tell me how it is that I died."
He wondered if it was from the plane, the numbers from his dream, the button or even the black cloud of smoke. Or maybe it was from the Ana Lucia who kept showing up as a warning. Or maybe Yemi had more to do with his "death" than Eko had thought.
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Jack Shephard
new oceanic 815.
Don't. Pity. Me. You have no idea what I've been through.
Posts: 197
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Post by Jack Shephard on Jun 20, 2008 16:40:25 GMT -5
"I don't care if you think I was 'born of the spirt of the Island' or whatever you think," Jack said angrily, "I'm not going back, and that's final. There's no reason for us to go back, and I have done too much to get this far and I'm not going to just ruin it by going back."
Eko asked how he died, and Jack scoffed, turning away from him as he brought his good hand to his face. "I can't believe this." he said tiredly, before he moved, nearly stumbling once again out of the bathroom, past Eko and to the bed once again. He reached by the bed for a bag, and pulled out a roll of gauze from the various supplies he had gotten from the hospital for Aaron. "I didn't see how you died. Locke told me later it was because of the Monster." Jack said as he tried o focus his good hand well enough to wrap gauze around the cut hand.
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Post by eko on Jun 20, 2008 17:27:53 GMT -5
Eko got up from his seat in the corner of the room as Jack sat on the bed trying to wrap a gauze in his drunken state. He came and sat beside the man, taking the gauze from him and offering a smile, "May I?"
He wasn't going to keep watching as the man clearly failed to do things himself. Eko always gave others a chance before he came in, and this time the chance had been used up.
He'd wrapped gauzes before. In his line of profession in Nigeria, they could not risk going to a medical clinic, but it was always someone else that got hurt. Eko had been virtually untouchable since he killed that man when he was a boy.
He assumed that was why this "monster" killed him on this island, because he had blood on his hands that he knew he would have to pay for. Death didn't scare Eko, because with death came forgiveness of sins.
"And did you see my brother on this island? A man named Yemi. A priest also." Eko questioned as he took Jack's hand from him and started to wrap it.
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Jack Shephard
new oceanic 815.
Don't. Pity. Me. You have no idea what I've been through.
Posts: 197
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Post by Jack Shephard on Jun 21, 2008 14:30:38 GMT -5
Jack jerked slightly as Eko's hand took his own, and he blinked, almost frightened. If...if he could touch him...could ghosts touch? Was he truely going crazy? He had heard of cases of people who claimed they interacted with t heir hallucinations...was he this case?
Eyes slightly wide, Jack looked at Eko as he asked whether he had seen Yemi on the Island. "No." Jack whispered, his h ead shaking slightly before he looked down at Eko's hands wrapping the gauze around his own. It was too much sleepless nights since they had came back, too many benders and too many pills, and yet, Jack knew if he tried all of them, one was bound to work. His head was pounding, and he wondered if this w as thebeginning of the end. This was the beginning of the end of his sanity.
"I think," he said slowly, trying to hold back the tears of frustration while trying to stay concious as he felt the alcohol and the pills slowly start to ravage his body. "you need to leave."
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Post by eko on Jun 21, 2008 17:59:17 GMT -5
Eko was confused that he had not seen his brother, but Eko was still sure that he had to have been there, so he knew he would have to ask other survivors about him.
As Eko saw the frightened looks that Jack was giving him at his touch... an apparent dead man's touch... Eko felt he had to say something.
He opened his mouth slowly pausing on the words. "When Jesus first came back, many of the disciples did not believe him, one of which was called Thomas. Do you know this story?" Eko asked him.
He gave the man another polite smile with his dark lips and continued. "He told them, 'Except I shall see in his hands the print of the nails, and put my finger into the print of the nails, and thrust my hand into his side, I will not believe.'" Eko took another deep breath, getting to his point with patience. "After eight days of unbelief from Thomas that Jesus was really alive, Jesus returned to his disciples. At that time He told Thomas the following: ' Reach hither thy finger, and behold my hands; and reach hither thy hand, and thrust it into my side: and be not faithless, but believing.'"
Eko stood up and pressed Jack's freshly gauzed hand to his own, his deep voice shaking for a moment. "So I say to you Mr Shephard, reach hither my hands and tell me if you think I am real or not."
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Jack Shephard
new oceanic 815.
Don't. Pity. Me. You have no idea what I've been through.
Posts: 197
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Post by Jack Shephard on Jun 24, 2008 2:17:26 GMT -5
As Eko spoke, Jack watched as he rolled the gauze around his hand with wide eyes. Tears burned at the back of his eyes, threatening to roll of and down his cheeks. He silently figured that it was the drugs and the booze that was making him feel this way...and the simple fact that he might have lost his mind. However, Eko's words cut deep. But...but it was impossible. Eko had died, that much Jack was sure of. Eko had been killed by the monster and he was dead. Gone.
Jack found it hard to believe in miracles. Most all of them could be easily explained away by science if thought hard enough. Even his ex-wife, even Sarah's spinal surgery, the so-called miraculous events that caused her to walk again, those could be explained by the body rebuilding itself. Healing itself. Jack didn't believe in miracles because he couldn't see it, couldn't touch it and feel it, and yet...what was this?
Tears welled up in Jack's eyes, and he felt his face twist up into a sob. He wanted so much to believe that Eko was here, that he was alive and standing in front of him, but if Eko was alive...that would mean Claire hadn't been lying. She wasn't sick...and he had ruined her.
Pulling his hand out of Eko's grasp, Jack wrapped his arms around his stomach. He turned away from Eko, and then spoke again. "Don't you see?!" he said suddenly, his voice tearfilled. "I've--I've ruined her life and he comes and tells me we have to go back and then you--" he stopped, clenching his jaw before he lashed out, slamming his gauzed hand against the wall. "I can't take this!" Jack yelled to Eko. "I refuse to sit here and deal with this. I want you to get up and I want you to walk out that door and I don't ever want to see you again. Tell my father the same thing, tell him to LEAVE ME ALONE."
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